how fitting, to start my blogging at a coffee shop in lawrence, ks.
trite? contrived? yep, you got it. fuck it, didn't jk rowling piece together harry potter by scribbling on napkins at coffee shops? ahh... coffee shops, i wish i could actually stomach coffee... it seems after a sip or two my insides begin to churn, my bowels twisting and screaming. give it about 5 minutes and it sounds like i'm farting in reverse and i'll begin to squirm as the gaseous build up becomes intolerable. at this point, i'll casually walk to the bathroom to deflate... fucking coffee...
like a vegan at FIVE GUYS, here i am at a coffee shop, henry's on eigth street to be exact.
its inimitable interior is inspiring enough. across from my table is a painting, a mural that looks like a hybrid of thomas benton and francis bacon. of course, the requisite local artwork... which is, eh, okay... i supposed... a little tepid and uninspired... actually it blows... whatever, support local artists eh?
no, this place is rad. there's never a shortage of western shirts and disheveled hair... the occasional cute girl, the occasional stealing and exchanging of glances... yeah, that's right... i'm talking to you, little lady with the adidas samba's and the nose ring. i want to approach her with something like, "so, what do you think of the new st. vincent album?" goddamn, i wish these things didn't matter to me, who cares if she likes the new st. vincent album or not... whatever, it's not like i have a fraction of the gumption it would take to ACTUALLY approach her...
Oh jesus... what have i done? i need to stop... i totally get it now... blogging, that is, not women.... allright, that's enough.
ciao
how is this not the most popular blog on the internet? can i have more of you proverbially shitting the carpet? this is amazing.
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